Victory means exit strategy, and it's important for the President to explain to us what the exit strategy is.    The Honorable Governor of Texas, George W. Bush

I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.    Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friday, June 09, 2006

Kick This Around

The Little Hun was telling me a story over ribs, spuds and asparagus about how a supplier for her shop, call him Dieter, called in from Munich today with a rather sudsy report on the World Cup opener. To which the response around the shop was apparently, ... oh, that's nice.

We Americans take a beating, likely deserved, for our provinciality. But this time I think we have it right. The FIFA World Cup "soccer" tournament is the ultimate stupidity in a stupid sport.

All right, all you soccer moms. Think I'm wrong? Let's line you up along the "goal" line. I'll put my golf spikes on and go down the line kicking each one of you squarely in the shin. How's that feel?

Of course, that kind of pain goes away, not like the brain damage from heading a ball, or worse, another head.

Ah, but then there's the pageantry of some rich Costa Ricans flying to Munich to see the national team go up against Germany. 'Cause if there's one thing we just don't have enough of in this world, it's nationalism.

Was I inspired by some prima donnas from the Boston suburbs prevailing over an under-funded Russian Army team in the "Miracle on Ice"? Oh, yeah, that was wicked awesome. Now let's invade Grenada. USA ... USA ...

But these are filler, the crux is this:

We have hands. We can do the most amazing things with them. We can communicate with them. Create tools with them. Love with them. Hurt with them. Express our most complex artistic sense with them.

And so the world is going to tell me that they have the ultimate athletic contest in the World Cup. This is the premier showcase in all of team sport?

You just can't use your hands.

That's just plain stupid.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home